Friday, December 26, 2008

Too Much Candy

It all started with the gingerbread house project. I must admit that I use the term "gingerbread" very loosely in this instance, because of course I didn't really make gingerbread, I used graham crackers. That's what my mom does, and her little cottages always turn out adorably cute--straight out of Hansel and Gretel. The ones we made, however, were not so cute. I was rushed. Due to my poor planning I found myself in the middle of 8 eager children with only one frosting bag. And so the houses had to go up quickly, and the crackers were broken, and there wasn't time to stabilize the structures. And so we made gingerbread shanties, and I didn't post pictures on the family website.

Matt was in charge of the candy. Usually when I send Matt to the store I have to give him a very detailed list, sometimes explaining what various items are and in which section of the store he can find them. He usually sighs and asks if it is really a good idea to send him because he might get the wrong thing, and don't I really want to go instead? Not this time. "Candy," he said, "got it." And he was gone in a flash. He returned with several grocery bags and I knew we were in trouble. After all of the shanties were made and decorated, and after little 20-pound Ava Mecham quietly ate more than three times her weight in jelly beans and no one noticed but Matt (who had her back and didn't alert her parents)--even after all of that, we still had 10 large bowls of candy sitting on our kitchen table.

Then there was Christmas morning and Santa and the stockings and more candy arrived.

And I was in charge of the family Christmas program and for some reason I let Matt's aunt Carole convince me that it would be a good idea to play the candy bar game--don't get me wrong, it is a really fun game and everyone loves it. However, I didn't think about the candy. My little family, Cora and Sydney included, happened to play very well this year and we all walked away with 2 or 3 king-sized candy bars EACH. And to top it off, the girls got candy in some of their gifts that night.

And somewhere along the way, and I don't know when it happened, we aquired a 10 pound bag of Swedish fish.

So I guess this post is really actually a plea--come over and eat my candy. Take it home with you, decorate the house you live in with it, feed it to your pets, make a candy bar poster and ask someone to prom--please, just make it go away.

Thank you, and good night.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

I know I don't usually write you letters. I am not really a wish list person, but this year, in honor of my new blog, I have decided to break tradition and send you a letter. So if you are going to bring me something this year, here are some options:

  • I'd really like a set of free weights. Or we can skip the weights and cut straight to the hard body. That would be fine too.
  • I'd love a perpetually clean house. Except sometimes when I've been really uptight about keeping the house clean, I feel guilty about that too--as though I'm not being free spirited and creative enough as a mother. So I guess what I'd really like is a doorbell that magically cleans the house to perfection, including a pleasant and not overpowering fragrance, every time it is pushed. Get the elves on that.
  • You know, I'd really like some new eyebrows. My blonde ill-shaped ones aren't really working out.
  • An embroidery machine. I've always wanted one. Not a cheapy one--the real deal so I can pretend I'm Martha Stewart and give everyone handmade gifts with their names or initials embroidered on them and then they will praise me.
  • I'd like some superpowers. To start I'd like the usual ones, to be able to fly and have super strength. I'd also like the ability to shape shift and move through space and time. And I want to speed read and have a photographic memory.
  • I'd like a free travel pass that gets me and my family on any airline anytime so that I can see the world, visit my loved ones, and have them visit me whenever I wish. Come to think of it--maybe you could just bring me your sleigh. Then I wouldn't have to go through security at the airport.

Thanks Santa. In return I'll be sure to leave you cookies and carrots for the reindeer.

With love,

Heather

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Snow Days in Seattle

I went outside today to check on my little snow bunnies and almost fell on my face about ten times. The snow is soft and is gently covering a half inch of flat frozen ice. It is treacherous.
I saw one car try to leave our neighborhood this morning. Their tires were spinning and they kept sliding backwards, but finally managed to get out thanks to my across the street neighbor, Leesa, who got out her kitty litter and spread it all over the road to help give them some traction. That's what I love about our new neighborhood, we share things like kitty litter.

Sydney and Cora went sledding for the first time today. I couldn't see Cora's face, but Sydney had a look of pure glee as she slid down the road. Amazingly, the morning didn't end in tears or bruises. Although it did end with Cora claiming she was about to throw up. All good things must come to an end in one way or another.

The snow continues to fall and so I'm hoping that tomorrow will be an equally lazy day. I would like to offer my thanks to everyone who drove their car into a ditch downtown or spun off the highway this morning so that schools and businesses would shut down and we could all feel justified in staying home by the fire. Your sacrifice was well worth it.